Back with a Bang.

Man, how fast life changes. I don’t even know what to say. This past month has really forced me to change a lot. It has forced me to think about how I speak, think, act, and trust. I have had to curb the course language that this university had allowed me this year. I have had to change my thoughts from being a single being to working as part of a team with K, and keep up with my friends. I have had to think about how physically close I am to K and what my actions say anytime. It has forced me to trust in God that when he brought K to me that he would understand my motives behind my thoughts, actions, and stories. This all came to a head when once again I was thinking about everything in the shower. Once again God’s knowledge made me both inspired and curl into a ball and never show my face again. I have been such an idiot. God revealed to me that I am allowing fear of what MIGHT come in the future to ruin what could be good right now. This is mainly about dating K, but also in the things I speak, and how I act. I have a chance to change all of these things and make something better of myself. I found this hugely encouraging and intend not to waste this chance. I ask for continued prayer and will have faith that God has set his angels around to you bless and protect you.

Finals

Alrighty finals are coming up and I will not be blogging everyday. I intend to keep reading my Bible, but I don't know if the blog will be updated. Sorry.

Wednesday.

Today I read 1 thes. The passage is beautiful, but God has been talking to me more about actions throughout than the reading.

1.If you do not receive the love of God through Christ you will not be saved.

2.Enjoying wickedness now means having judgement later.

3.We are chosen for salvation and sanctification.

4.The Lord is faithful and he will protect us from the evil one.

5.God can direct our hearts toward love and steadfast faith.

1 Thessalonians

This weekend was hard. Saturday was good, and Sunday started good but ended with me having to apologize. I wasn't paying enough attention to the HS and ended up hurting a friend which caused him (a non-christian) to retaliate the best way he knew how. Hurting me back. The day ended well, but it could have been so much better. On the other hand it was encouraging to know I had to apologize, and knowing I wanted to make things right, stepping up as the christian, by apologizing in person and not waiting or holding it off. That ended up being exactly what I did. I did not allow pride to let me just pretend it didn't happen or wait for the perfect time to apologize.

Now today the words I got were:

1.We really live if you stand firm in the Lord.

2.God has called us to be clean.

3.God has not destined us for wrath, but salvation. (Salvation once obtained cannot be revoked by the enemy.)

4.Examine everything carefully holding fast to the good and abstaining from evil.

St. Patricks overview

The day of green beer has passed with many other rezzies drunk, my one friend slighty tipsy (and thus he could walk and talk, but her was just a cuddle monster), and many tired faces (either partiers or those woken up by parties). I personally drank a green slurpee (well partially green) and watched Disney movies with some friends. I was reading my Bible today and here is what I got:

1. The gospel is not just words it also in power and the Holy Spirit.

2. We need to accept the ministry we are given so we can fulfill it.

3. Our words need to be pleasing to God, not men.

4. we need to encourage and exhort each other in love to guide each other deeper and deeper into the kingdom of God.

5. Jesus is our hope, joy, and exaltation.

I know some of these are repetition of what I have already learned, but God doesn't lay something irrelevant on our hearts.

Days go by

Colossians was my target for the day and once again I will summarize what I read, but first I will say that God has just been leading me to trust what he says. I have been ignoring some small things I could have been doing, and I am learning that sometimes the small things are the big things.

Today's lessons-

1.We are reconciled and are presented as Holy and Blameless before God. We need to do our best to remain blameless and Holy to the people around us as well. Christians should stand out in word and deed.

2.We are permitted to have the mysteries hidden to past generations through the HS we just need to ask.

3.God has disarmed rulers and authorities, made a display of them, and triumphed for our good. We can beat the system, correction we already have.

4.We are new people in God and can be revealed in glory if we stick to being a new self.

5. Whatever we do, we should do whole-heartedly as for the Lord and not for men. (usually it ends up being for God's glory anyway)

Have a blessed day!

Oh Philipians.

I have had an interesting couple of days. A couple of my friends are cracking under pressure, and I am trying my best to help them out with just relaxing and taking a deep breath. They don't have God so life is significantly more hopeless for them, and well yeah.

Things I learned today:

(Today's message is brought to you by the Holy Spirit, Bible, and focus on the word.)

1. God can provide if we just pray and trust

2. Everything we gain is loss anyway if not gained for good/through good

3. Setting your mind on earthly things will bring destruction, an appetite as their god,and glory will be their shame.

4. Sometimes Holy Spirit opens door way faster or slower than you expect and you have to fully trust to know what to say, how to act, and when the opportune moment will occur.

Motivation

Today I read 2 chapters and was thinking about keeping a pure mind focused on what was right when I said something I was very unmotivated to my roommate.

Here were my reminders from today:

1. words have power and thus I am motivated today

2. pure minds are beautiful powerful and a precious tool for the kingdom

3. I should do all work as if it is directly for the Lord (chances are in the long run it is)

4. I should claim the things I want and need from the Lord.

Random sidenote Mothergoose I am wearing the horse necklace you made me, and my friend who I met at campus for Christ really likes it and says you are very talented.

Choice

My life has been stressful lately to say the least. I have been putting unnecessary pressure on myself, and yet I got the right kind of pressure yesterday. I am making God time again, listening to the right music again, and focusing on what I want from God again type of pressure. I was worrying about all the wrong things, and I got a call from the Holy Spirit about it. I just figured that I would hold unto what I had heard, and wouldn't really change anything until I got around to it. Then my God sent my Grandfather in a bold new way. I found out Thursday or Friday that my Großvater's surgery was a success and all had gone well....wait what surgery?!?!?!? I called my Grandfather just after he got home to talk, and this was verified. I was relieved all had gone well, but Grandpa and I are pretty close. I visit my Grandpa a lot, especially in the summer, and have gotten to know him quite well. He said into the phone (much to Grandma's horror) something along the lines of "I have very high expectations for you. You know what is right, and I believe that you are following these lines to fruition. You also know how I will feel if you fail to do what is right in the key times." Don't freak out. Grandpa knows I do well under pressure, and he knows full well that I should be listening to the Holy Spirit just like him. He had obeyed, and set me straight. Now my choice was clear, that I was beginning to be lukewarm, and I needed to get stirred up again because God doesn't like lukewarm. Check out Revelation 3:16 if you don't believe me.

Really?

I can't believe it. I finally got something to click in my head. I cannot justify letting people walk over me, time not spent with the Holy Spirit, or why that didn't go just as I want it to anymore. I have to stand tall for myself and get the energy to do it form the HS. I need to justify stopping studying for a few minutes to read my Bible, and being careful of what I hear or say. I just need to stand for something so I don't get pushed into anything.

Hello again.

Hey so midterms are over and God blessed me. The stress was huge and I thought I had finally cracked under the pressure, but the exam I thought I fail I got a bearable mark in. I also applied to be an RA next year, and managed to get some other important stuff done. Today I read 2 chapters in Nehemiah and 2 in Ephesians. God has really been speaking about how to properly use his name, and address him. This has lead to me beginning to realized how big he is, although I don't think I fully understand quite yet.

Blast!

Today was Nehemiah 1 and 1 Peter 1&2. Just for the record, I hate midterms almost as much as finals. Research papers take to much focus, and I cannot wait for the break.

yo

So I just wanted to say I read a chapter in Ezra and 3 in romans yesterday, and am about to read the same pattern today. Life has been really busy for blogging but I want to stay accountable.

Revelation Day!

Man oh live starting a day with a revelation of God is just fantastic. Seriously. wow. I am in university having a hard time motivating myself to study and all of a sudden I start dancing and singing very quietly so that I don't get a noise complaint. As I danced I remembered all the glory that I could be giving to God. I just got hit with a huge wave to love for others. I am passionate about older kids and preteens who are growing into the shape and form of who they will be for the rest of their life. I just want to do really well here now so that I can get whatever job I apply for to impact the lives of the kids that God needs me to impact. I read my Bible today and It was wonderful all about being in control of our flesh, but I am really filled with love right now. I think it is time to leave a little gift for some friends to brighten up their day! Toodles!

4-6 of ROMANS!!!

Okay so this weekend has been one of many different trials. Emotions, messed up sleep patterns, and a totally random style of events. Total distraction should about sum it up. I read 1 chapter in Ezra so that I can keep working through the old testament which often confuses me and thus gets read a little at a time. I then prayed for some more focus because I am still distracted today, and read 3 more chapters of Romans.

4:5 used the word reckoned and as I kept reading I noticed reckoned used several times in different contexts. I looked it up in my concordance/greek study at the back of my Bible and was informed that it can mean to be thought of, considered, or accounted in the section of the text from the original Hebrew and Greek words. Now verse 3 becomes "But to the one who does not work, but believes in Him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is thought of/accounted/considered as righteousness,". This can be done to the rest of this chapter and continually accounts/gives/assigns righteousness as an aftereffect of faith. Then comes justification.

Chapter 5 is called the results of justification. The first verse says we have been justified by faith. Wait....freeze...chakai..chakai...Righteousness was the result of faith...Justification was the result of faith....logical reasoning called causalities (a section of mental maturity that should be quite simple by age 12) say that righteousness therefore is the justification of faith. Then it is also all the other things described in chapter 5. The thing that brings us peace with God, eventually bringer of hope from love....it goes on. It then changes topics to sin and salvation. It talks about how one man brought sin into humanity, and one man saved us. How salvation is a free gift, and it's not as random of a jump as you may first think. Admitting Jesus into your heart is the very first act of faith towards righteousness.

Chapter 6 talks about the importance of being dead to sin. Allowing Jesus to rule your life and help you be in control of your body is one of the hardest acts of faith to master. There are so many layers to your being. Soul, brain, nervous system, digestive system, cardiac system, muscular system, and emotions. All of them should be completely led and guided by God through his Holy Spirit. That's alot of the things we like to control. I personally need to rethink how much he has, and learn to offer my all.

Romans!

Okay so today was try a new book of the Bible day. I like to go and reread chapters a lot. Today I realized I have not read Romans in a long time...like I can't remember how long ago, I just remember I did.

What struck me was the reminder of how we are all completely equivalent to God, and how we should treat others as equals. God has no favorites so we shouldn't either. The first 3 chapters talk much about having fair chances at everything with God and so we should give others fair chances. It also covers how although we don't always act fairly or without bias we should strive to. God forgives us when we don't act completely fairly, and we shouldn't allow having something not go our way ruin or day or our attitude.

yeah...

blogging did not get done Friday. Sorry my bad.

Part 2

Alright so as promised I did my reading, and the last quarter of 1 Corinthians was wonderful. I have studied this book before, and so much was just reaffirming what I already understood or had come to terms with. I was struck with a thought from my english class. The class is mostly analytical reading and how to notice symbolism which I have found astoundingly helpful in finding new meaning to my bible reading. The quote from my prof that came to mind today...ever notice how we define everything by its opposite?...the lecture went on, but that is all that applies here. Now if I always loved this passage defining what love is, and now I can redefine it by saying what it is not. (I will not be putting verse numbers just follow from 13:4-8). SO I am about to define what hate is so you can compare to the biblical definition of love.

Hate cannot wait, is cruel, and jealous. It brags and is arrogant. Hate behaves embarassingly (or unbecomingly), it seeks its own, and is provoked. It keeps tracks of all wrongs, rejoices in unrighteousness and lies. It can bear nothing, believes nothing, has no hope, and endures nothing. Hatred always fails.

Well ....huh...look at that hatred is the root of so much evil. Now we now why. This theory makes me think of love as the source of all good. (and as my english prof would say) Here's the kicker God is love. Let's follow this train of thought shall we? Hatred = root of evil. Opposite = Love. Love = root of all good. Love = God therefore God= root of all good. Well look at that. Using a logical worldly practice of defining something by its opposite there is now extreme hope and a lifestyle basis.

That was my big deal for the day. It kinda took over my brain, and I will probably ponder it through my next class. In the mean time I will inform you that I get a huge kick out of turning world theories into supernatural proofs, and that irony always seems to be hugely informative and amusing to me. Get used to me making lame ironic jokes, about irony other people often don't notice. So yeah enjoy.

Encouragement

Today I have not yet read my bible. It will happen but I got distracted...by a Holy conversation ...with two other christians....in the halls...at a secular university. Chance. I think not. Erica and Rachel are two other girls who live in residence with me, and I now know have similar thoughts on a lot of important life issues. Wonderful. This all started with a debate I missed called Is God real? It was hosted by my university to have atheists and theists debate their arguments on the existence of a divine being. I missed it. Erica informs me that it was extremely interesting. We were talking in the halls starting with this debate, but a lot of my encouragement came from the discussion afterwards. They sound just like I did about miracles a couple of years ago. These two lovely ladies both believe that Christ died for them, the end times are here just not quite yet, the HS is a guide and a gift, and that each generation of Christians and the church has a new trial to face, like some point where they just have to rise up and make a stand on faith. This was pretty exciting to me. The fact that I found at least two other people my age who are willing to risk being labeled as christian in a world that does not always smile on religion is amazing. The debate was apparently long and a little bit tense at points. The chairs and stairs in 2 lecture halls were full for this event. The second hall was opened and they live fed it to there. Here is the most interesting part to me. The theists line was longer at the end...aka there were more theists. The theists were more willing to use faith and knowledge about the atheists science against the atheists than the atheists were willing to show up. The atheists apparently said some things that were offensive at points, and had to really work hard to keep their theories on creation, life, and adaptation valid.

The debates proved to the girls that creationists are more willing to study other theories and know them, and that knowing the other theories appears to strengthen their faith all the more. I mean I think evolution has more holes than a strainer, but apparently so do many others. The girls and I are debating getting together more often to discuss what we read and our beliefs and I am pretty excited to see what God will show them if they start getting a hold on using faith for spiritual gifts. Anyway post more later. Now for lunch and class.

Details

Okay so I think it's time for some basic facts about me.

1) I am simply using this as a chance to organize my thoughts and understanding on what I read each day.

2) Proverbs is my favourite book of the Bible followed by Hebrews and Corinthians. Thus they will probably appear again and again.

3) I have an extremely hard time reading through the family trees in the Bible and thus you will probably never ever see a blog about them. I have read them.

4) the posts will probably always be on 4-5 chapters because one of the people I work with at the camp who I have the uttermost respect for allowed me to vent about my worries concerning moving to University, and his recommendation was reading 4-5 chapters everyday to calm myself. He was right. It soothes me to no end to sit and just read for a while.

5) I just realized how much I hate the little red lines from spelling errors.

6) I was kinda down in the dumps yesterday about an old friend and handled it much better than I normally would have, and thus think that the soothing of my soul by reading is a positive influence on the people around me.

7)You can thank God that I am in a good mood. No seriously he deserves a lot of thanks that is such a minor one to give him.

8)today I read 1 Corinthians 9-12

Okay so details out of the way. Paul has once again switched topics. Chpt 9 is all about freedom or as the title in my Bible reads Liberty (NASB baby!) Paul speaks on several aspects of the topic, but one in specific kinda began itching at me again. vs 23. "And I do all things for the sake of the gospel, that I may become a fellow partaker of it." which is followed by the quite well known passage about running a race to win, which is also noteworthy in the thought process. God has been speaking to Paul about doing all things for the gospel, a common message that I have been questioning about lately, and talking about how every action belongs to him to be used for the good of the kingdom of heaven. Intense. Wait every action? is what my mind screams well. yeah .....I have a long way to go. I mean yay I started a blog and am reading my bible every day, I had a virus removed from my body by prayer, stopped swearing, and have called on people to keep me accountable! ....but that is not enough. That is not all of me that is just bringing my body and mind under my control (another good thing says the last verse of the chapter). Okay well I'll keep reading because for some strange reason even when the Bible is pointing out the many things I need to change and bring under control I still feel calmed and filled with joy. Nothing else I have ever read pointing out my flaws makes me want to work harder. I mean usually when people are pointing out all my flaws I want to (in this order) cry, sleep, eat junk food, exercise(cause I feel fat from the junk food....like I can almost feel my arteries clogging), and then prove whoever pointed out my flaw that they were completely wrong. I figure that this is a sign that this is a good book and good for my overall wellbeing.

Anyway Chpt 10 once again is hitting a nail on the head. We are back to the whole

lukewarm thing. As in "You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons; you

cannot partake of the table of the Lord and the table of demons.". What I am getting out of this is

that God really wants you just to make a decision and be committed to it. The whole reason I

started blogging was because I decided that was a bad idea, and oh look at that God reassured me this

was a disgusting thing to him. Personally I am just glad that this is actually a faith based on a God

who is willing to encourage us with nudges, hints, and sometimes (please read with symbolism) large

flashing signs(although God could use a large flashing sign if he wanted). I mean it can't be chance that

just after I decide to do this by feeling that I was not living a christian life, that a verse shows up saying

look you have to pick one or the other not both. just sayin'.

Chpt 11-12 talk about the order of the church and spiritual gifts, which in all honestly explaining

are not my forte. I personally think that spiritual gifts are fantastic. I have heard tongues, seen healings,

felt healings, watched miracles, and still wonder on the details of these sometimes. I personally

see much more value in an interpreter of tongues that a healer sometimes. I mean if I had never gone to

church before and walked in to a whole crowd of people speaking tongues I would rather have an

interpretor than a healer. The gifts are all very important and I can explain them with some sense in

person, but as far as online goes I will say that the gifts are very important, and Paul acknowledges

this. The way Paul goes about it is fairly self explanatory so you probably should just sit down with the

HS and your Bible for this part. Personally I really desire to prophecy, and God sent my friend Anna to

me this summer to tell me that I was a prophet. I still have not had a vision or dream, but I am studying

and speaking over myself. Tongues is an experience in itself that I have not personally experienced.

Healings make me want to laugh and sing, and words of knowledge are very inspiring. The gifts are

very diverse and really can make an impact on a ministry. If you are interested pick up not only your

Bible, but trying books like the ones by Copeland, Winston, or Duplantis.

Hmm...anything else to say???? Just to have a blessed day and pray for the girls walking by in

my hall talking about how drunk they intend on being.....oh and that I have had more spare time, and

been generally more efficient since I started making intentional time with God. If you have 12 hours'

work and ten hours. I recommend you start with an hour of God time.

Day 2

Alright. So this is officially going better than many other attempts. I honestly can blame my mac for having this come up on my favourites screen and remind me. So today I read 1 corinthians 5-8.

I have done studies on the letters Paul wrote to the church of Corinth before with a group of young ladies back home. The church in corinth definitely had some massive issues. Sin was running rampant through the whole church, and Paul was saddened by the news. He began writing letters to the church to help them understand why what they were doing was a big deal, and he also was trying to give advice on how to solve this problem. Paul gives lots of amazing advice for relationships, general happiness, and he has a message of how to treat others.

Paul starts by talking about intimate relationships and immorality in the followers. If you are looking for verses about marriage and dating this I highly recommend. I am looking more at 6:20 & 7:23 where he is talking about our relationship with God. Theses verses both speak of how we were bought with a price. I don't think Paul accidentally reminded these people of how much they were loved as he was trying to rebuke them about some of their behaviours. Paul knew that the pleasure of the flesh was reigning, and that they needed to see what the replacement option was for them. Love. True, real, everlasting love. This is love at its finest and it was open to them. He also wants them to have an example of what a relationship based in love is like. He is trying to tell them how to interact.

It doesn't seem to work. The people seem to want to change, which is fantastic, but they need him to explain some things in their next letter. It appears that they asked Paul about meat concerning Idols. Here is the deal. Pagan idols were still quite common and all these other religions would give the meat to their Gods, but rather than let it go to waste they would sell the meat to Christians or other non-believers in that God. It was a way to make money for their temples(This is how it was explained to me anyways). The people of the church were having issues with deciding if this meat was fine to eat or not. Paul seems to think the meat is fine, because from his view point the idol is a hunk of metal and had no power...aka it was meat put in a building for a while or even cooked there then sold. He has a but to add. He figures the meat is fine, BUT if there is someone present who does believe it is tainted don't touch it. Paul is making an example of if you love someone then you will do nothing to harm them in anyway. That makes sense to me. The message I'm getting from this is we should be weary of all our actions, and that if anything we do will make a brother falter stop. It is giving me something to think about. Is anything I'm saying, acting, or practicing holding back someone else?

I can think of a few rumours, gossip, actions, words, and practices that I have heard, been a part of, accepted, or (wait for it) NOT done that could have been the changing factor(it's a little ridiculous the memories the Holy Spirit is bringing to mind). It makes me wonder what I have been missing out on by not being attentive. Man now I will probably be thinking of this for a while...or until tomorrow when the HS reminds me of something else I have let slide lately. Well guess I will find out.

Let's do this.

So I am now a blogger. Guess wonders never cease. I have tried journals and diaries before, but knowing that no one would ever read them meant I didn't feel very compelled to use them on any sort of regular bases. Same with my Bible readings. No one else could for sure say if I had done them or not, so I would procrastinate. I want to read my Bible every day. I want to change this world. I see so many hurt and hurting people, and I want to improve their life. I don't think this is wrong. Actually, I think that if the Kingdom of Heaven invaded the earth then we could all-like every single person in the world-be genuinely joyful. Not just content or happy, flat out joyful.

The whole blogging thing was never really my style..or so I thought. I mean vlogging on youtube I debated. I think writing it out will prevent it becoming me venting, even though that is exactly what this is. I have been a christian for a few years, but I decided this August that I had to either live my faith or give it up. I was not going to be lukewarm anymore. All was going well at first. I have been attending church or at least watching a sermon every Sunday and reading my Bible letting the Holy Spirit guide me. (I should probably explain I am an 18 year old university student...weird stuff for a non-religion based University) I felt like I was doing things right. Wrong. Going to church only makes you as much of a Christian as walking into a garage makes you a car. This New Years was spent at the camp were I help spread God's love to kids in the summer, and I decided that I was not doing enough. I had a few small personal healings, and I had been given the right words to speak to my friends (mainly non-believers), but I had begun hearing about all the amazing miracles happening world wide based in faith (think Finger of God). I was shaken. Then I kept thinking about how far I would let my faith grow before it got scary, and I would pull it back. Faith can move mountains. I was not even kicking viruses out of my own body. The final kicker-

A professor in my history of world religions class asked how many of us practiced a religion or called themselves religious. We did not actually have to raise our hands, just think about it. It's the next question that got me. Now how many of you would be willing to give it all, including our lives for that belief? BAM. I had just gotten a Godly word/push/inquisition into everything that was shaking my faith. So what am I willing to risk? I decided that I wanted it to be it all. Everything. My first step is making sure I am walking letting the Holy Spirit guide my every action. I need to keep myself on track. I need a diary to track the days for me. I am not sure if this will be serious, funny, or bland, but it needs to be done. 1 Corinthians 4:20 says "For the kingdom of God does not consist in words, but in power.". Alright then I will use words to keep me heading towards power. God loves us. Healings, resurrections, miracles. They take power. Those are what people need to see to see God. I wonder what one little step of faith-like me blogging- can start?

One last thing. I am writing this blog for whoever is reading this. I don't know much about writing a good sermon. I'm not even that great at writing my own memories down. I hope this inspires you in some way. Personally, I feel very compelled to finish something I promise to do. I am promising God I will try. I am promising you I will try to blog everyday until I don't feel this is what I should do anymore. Like I said Holy Spirit guided is what I want. Who knows, maybe no one will ever read this either.